In Progress

A work in progress -
When you really give thought to the name in my of my blog you realize that a work in progress doesn't always mean I'm positively moving forward. In fact, there are times when you could say that I am "working" my way straight backward and forgetting lessons I've learned. I sat for a long time tonight and tried to decide what is keeping me from working my way forward and to a better place. What be so huge in my life that would prevent me from having a sense of peace? I'm thinking to myself all the possible reasons: pride, selfishness, laziness, and suddenly it hit me: fear.

It is one thing to be shy, but I am beginning to have a different outlook on fear. If we are commanded that we ought not to fear death itself, what trivial thing could be so frightening that could paralyze a pretty forthright girl. Fear. As much as I would like to say that I have managed to progress into a better person, and blah blah blah... I'm still afraid.

A person can only be so strong on their own, The rest they must lean on God and his family to help you through. That is one of my favorite characteristics is that I will never do something so bad to be written off. I am bad about doing that with people, and it leaves me having lost some very good friends that just needed some better communications. I would love to set the fear aside and be able to say those unspeakable words.... I miss you, come back to me.

So I have been praying to make the conscious decision to lean on God and face my fears. I am not sure how this will turn out, so please just keep me in your prayers. I have a feeling that it will turn out very painful in the beginning, but full of love in the end. For when you lean on God...there's always love.